How Naughty Can Be Oh So Nice


Dear Reader,


So, it was Ladies' Brunch the other day. About
6 of us got together in pretty dresses and
very expensive shoes, and we all chatted
merrily about the latest and greatest things
gong on in our lives.

One friend's baby is coming up on her first
birthday while another is starting her first
company. Another friend is getting ready to
take a vacation while another was proud that
she had lost 8 pounds.

How did you lose it, I asked?

She blushed and said, honestly, she and her
hubby and bought some new "toys" and they were
having more sex. More "Kinky" sex, and it was
putting her in such a god mood, that she
started hitting the gym again.

Who knew, huh?

Well, because we are all horny little
ladies, that just opened up the door to
a tell-all Naughty Sex Fest.

The Momma was saying coyly, that she
happened to be a fan of the "back door"
sex (we all started screaming, laughing).

Another was telling me she has interesting
pictures of her in latex.

And of course, I had to chime in with
the beauty of some finely placed ropes
and blindfolds.

Backdoors and latex and ropes, OH MY!

That's right ladies, a LOT of women
and men are out there, walking around
looking perfectly "normal" but what
you DON'T know is that they're
having NAUGHTY SEX.

AND YOU SHOULD TOO.

What????

Yeah, yeah, put away your inhibitions and
your judgments and listen to me.

When I say "Naughty Sex," what dirty,
little thoughts go through your mind?

Maybe you picture blindfolds and restraints.

Or maybe your mind goes to spanking and latex.

Perhaps Naughty to you means sex in the behind.

Or a threesome.

Maybe naughty equals sex in a place where you
could get caught.

Or if your man wears YOUR panties or the two
of you watching porn sounds super duper naughty.

Hmmm.

OK, maybe some make you think, "ewwwwwwwww,
gross!"

I bet a few of these made you think, "Oh My!
That's kind of dirty. Who would do such a thing?"

But I would also bet that there is probably one
or two on this list, (and a few others you can
think of on your OWN) that make you get a little
hot and bothered just thinking about it.

And you thought, "Oooooooooooh yeah, who'd
do that? I would!"

BUT....

It's wrong, right? It's...

DIRTY, NAUGHTY, TABOO, KINKY...BAD.

Or is it?

Maybe you can also just think about as
LUSTFUL, EXCITING, VARIETY and "OUR
LITTLE SECRET."

I mean, why does naughty have to be bad?

Why can't naughty be good?

I'm making a case that it IS.

OK, hear me out.

I'm not telling you to get a goat
and a ball gag and hang from the
Eiffel Tower while doing a live
web cast...

I mean, I'm an animal lover.

BUT...

I AM going to tell you that some
of the happiest, sexually fulfilled
couples out there are doing some
super naughty sexual acts in
the privacy of their own bedrooms,
hotel rooms, bathtubs full of
chocolate pudding, in tents on the
beach, in rarely travelled stairwells,
with their office doors closed,
etc.

And if you're a little open
minded (and open legged!) then you
can be one of those couples too...

One of those happy couples that
rock each others world. And nobody
else know HOW great their sex is,
unless you care to brag, Naughty Girl!

So let's talk about what I like to
think of as DARING sex.

Pushing the level of your
sexual comfort zone just a little
bit farther.

First of, why ARE we turned on by
these taboo sexual rituals?

Why do we get physically aroused with
the thought of some acts that are
considered, in society, to be
BAD and UNACCEPTABLE?

For this answer, I turned to not
one but TWO experts. Jack Morin,
who wrote 'The Erotic Mind' says,

"The messy reality is that it's
harder to have sex with someone
you love. The idea that finding
one's true love will automatically
lead to a lifetime full of
satisfying combustible sex is a
"hearts and flowers" mentality.
In truth, relationships, sex and
eroticism are infinitely more
complicated."

Ah yes, which proves what I
always thought... A great sex life
takes work. It must continue to
evolve if you want to continue to
be happy.

And the ever fabulous Traci
Cox, (I swear, I can't make this crap
up.) the star of "Sex Inspectors"
and the author of 'Super Hot Sex,'
had this to say on the subject:

She says, "Sex seems to suffer when
people become closer, possibly because
we lose our sense of "otherness". We
are less likely to think about our
OWN needs and get too far caught up in
satisfying theirs...(BUT) There
are some couples out there who manage
to balance intimacy and excitement,
getting the best of both worlds. All
they've done is UPPED THE "KINK" FACTOR."

Ah, very interesting.

In other words, We don't really often
have hardcore, raunchy mind blowing
sex in long term relationships.

Not because we stopped loving each other.
But maybe we got too COMFORTABLE with
each other.

It's just a little harder to have naughty
sex with someone we adore. We want to
feel accepted by our partner, so often,
we have "Safe Sex" and I don't just
mean sex with a condom...

But the drawback is that you take away
the tension, the bit of fear, shyness,
unfamiliarity and you may also get
"comfortable" and "OK sex" and "Boring."

UGH. That's the kiss of death.

So what do you do?

BRING IN THE RISK..

Become more sexually adventurous.

And the plus side is you get to decide
what that looks like for you and your man.

It could be as simple as bringing in
a blindfold for you OR him.

Or talking dirty.

Or anal stimulation.

Or Tie-up games.

Or Role playing.

Or a Vibrating C**k ring (I swear they
have them and I swear they are AWESOME
for the BOTH of you!)

Watching adult films together and acting
part of them out.

Whatever it is that's just a TAD
out of your comfort zone, I say
try it out!

And I've got chapters on ALL these things
in my book plus ways to "introduce"
these ideas to your man, so check it out here:

"Bliss in the Bedroom: A Real Woman's Guide to Better Sex"


Remember what I always say:

Keep doing what you're doing, and you'll
keep getting what you're getting.

So if you want a ham sandwich, every day,
FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE, then hey, knock
your socks off.

BUT...

If you want some fabulous buffet with a
little bit of everything, well, then,
ASK FOR IT.

In other words,

If you guys just do a little wank, lick
and poke, poke... then congratulations.
That's ALL IT WILL EVER BE UNLESS YOU
PUT ON YOUR BIG GIRL PANTIES AND TRY
SOMETHING NEW.

Just remember a few things:

You must, must MUST HAVE:

An open mind and the ability to
talk about your sex life.

Remember that what turns on one of
you may not turn on the other.

That's OK. Just take baby steps and
be willing to compromise.

And keep in mind that your relationship
comes first. So set clear boundaries
before you start to make sure
you both are on the same page.

Whether it be when to stop, if you are
trying something only once or you
want to incorporate it into a weekly
deal, whatever. It's best that
there are no surprises walking into it...
except the surprise about how much
fun you're having!

And even if you two get "ready" to try
something new, but one of you chickens
out at the last minute, don't stress out
about it.

It's the process. It's the fact that you
two are willing to PUSH your levels of
comfort TOGETHER.

Of course, it's one thing to be ready
to try something new and start
spicing things up when it gets a little,
oh, you know, lukewarm.

It's another to KNOW what to do.

Aaaah, but have no fear.

That's where I come in.

There are dozens of ways to not just
re-ignite the spark, but feeling that
spark of chemistry and hot passionate
desire like you did the FIRST time.

If you've been reading this far, then
you owe it to yourself to get a copy
of my ebook, "Bliss in the Bedroom: A Real Woman's Guide to Better Sex"


ESPECIALLY THOSE OF YOU WHO WRITE ME
FOR TIPS AND TECHNIQUES.

I've got them all for you, babe, in one
book, all ready for you to read!

In it, you'll find:

- Naughty but nice suggestions that WILL
bring the fire back into you sex life.

- Hot little tips to make that man in your
bed forget any woman before you.

- Positions with YOUR pleasure in for you.

- And REAL ways to bring your fantasies to life
in the bedroom or in other rooms...

- How to get you man to really get your toes to
curl.


And if for some reason you're not thrilled,
then please keep writing.

Your letters inspire me.

Send any questions